Some rough waters

Things have been a bit rocky lately. I feel like all I do is talk about death these days. I’m ready for this particular cycle to be over, thank you very much.

Last Sunday was our big family reunion. It was mostly lovely, except for the fact that my Grandmother’s cousin Lee died from cancer that morning. And the fact that my cousin Ginger is most likely having a leukemia relapse.

That afternoon, my cousin Caitlin came to ask if I was missing a chicken. Naturally, it was dear little Gretel, whom I had just taken back to the coop the day before. She had gotten out somehow and one of my uncle’s stupid, basically allowed to run wild, dogs had gotten her.

Two days later, I moved Hemy and the kittens out of the crate so they could run in the grass. The next morning, one of the white ones was mysteriously dead. It may have been a spider bite, but we aren’t sure. We moved the rest back up to the garage in the hopes that they’d be safe.

Two days ago, my friend Seth’s ex-girlfriend (who he’d been with for 6 years and was still in love with) was struck by lightning and killed at one of our favorite hiking spots. My best friend Teddi, who worked with her, called Seth to get more details and ended up inadvertently being the one to tell him she was dead. Poor Teddi is now doubly distraught.

And then, this morning as I went to feed, there were two cop cars down at the farmhouse we’ve been remodeling. My grandfather was there too. Turns out, sometime last night, someone broke in and stole a lot of very expensive tools, including the trailer and tools belonging to the guy who is doing the siding.

I’m really not trying to drum up sympathy. I just needed to get these things out into words so they would get out of my head. And I know, the loss of a chicken and a kitten don’t even compare with the loss of human life, but they weigh on you because they are in your care and you’re supposed to keep them safe. It’s just all been emotionally draining. I need an emotional nap.


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